Being Crazy is Hard Work

I’m not one to beemaifeaturesat around the bush so I’m just going to say it point blank.  BEING CRAZY IS HARD FUCKING WORK.  One of the hardest parts about being crazy is trying to trick others into thinking that you have your shit together.  You still have to get up and go to work everyday because not only is being crazy hard work it is also expensive.  Then once you get there you have to be able to maintain relationships with your co-workers even on the days you want to put your hood up, head phones in and lay your head down on the desk.  This apparently is not acceptable behavior for a 34 year old who workings in the accounting department.  Don’t ask me how I know, I just do.  Then your day is not scheduled by fun things like lunch, break-time or time to go home, you run on your own schedule that consist of taking the correct pill at the correct dose at the correct time.  All of us have different schedules for this and there are times it changes, that really screws us up.  Once again you have to figure this out and REMEMBER to do it correctly.

So after you get through the work day and hopefully you could be some what productive, not spending all 8 hours looking at cat memes, you get to go home.  This is when it can get tricky.  You can go home and cook supper, watch a movie and spend hours on the internet or you have the option of going on an adventure.  These are always fun and yimagesou’ll never know if you will be driving to Kansas before you realize that you have to work in the am and only have $10 in your bank account or will be spending the night looking at every item at Goodwill.  Sometimes going to bar is nice option but once again 1 beer could be enough or the magic number could be 20, that is never determined until at that moment.

Then the additional things that everyone wants in their life, like relationships comes into play.  Finding the right human that can put up with your constant mood swings and days that you want to cry and punch someone at the same time or the days when all you can manage is moving from the bed to the couch.  Along with the depressive days are the times you don’t sleep more than a few hours a night, you laugh at everything and just make noise to make noise.  All in all it is like dating a 4 yr old that doesn’t want to go to school but in adult form, with sometimes mean adult opinions.

Then the worst part about being crazy is the med appointments and doctors visits you have to attend. cddb70ba849e7efa0932fa4cb50334f83e63fde66d132c4e2ebfe931005b2d6f If you don’t go to these as scheduled, they know something is up and then they really watch you like a hawk.  It is best to go to these, trying to keep it together the whole time you are there and also trying filling out the mental health assessment in secret, as much as you can. Otherwise that piece of paper will stay with you for life and you will get endless arm pats and “the look” from strangers.  To keep everyone on the same page it basically takes a team of horses from the Pharmacy, Doctors Office, Therapist, and your self.  This, in my opinion, is asking a lot out of crazy person.  See why this is hard work and most individuals are un-diagnosed, under medicated or have just given up two months in?    On that note, be nice to crazy people; we are already struggling to keep it together.

 

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